Self-Nurturing vs Self Care: For Moms

Self-nurturing vs self care: Two phrases that sound similar, but can they be used interchangeably? Let’s get into it.

self-nurture vs self-care for moms

Self Care definition

According to Google, the definition of “care” means: the provision of what is necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone or something.

This sounds so baseline and absolute minimum to me. So, my definition of self-care was going above and beyond this.

Self-nurturing definition

The definition of “nurture” according to Google is: care for and encourage the growth or development of.

Doesn’t this sound so much more important? This is going above and beyond just doing what’s necessary to get by. This focuses more on yourself as a whole and encompasses the continued growth and development of yourself.

The focus of self-nurturing is to “fill your bucket” so that when the exhaustion of being a mom, wife, partner, friend empties out that bucket, you still have some reserves.

How do we self-nurture as busy moms?

After hearing the definition of self-nurture, you’re probably thinking that it sounds like something someone would be able to accomplish who doesn’t have kids and responsibilities. I hear you.

I’m going to help you get past that and teach you how to practice self-nurturing during your day to day life and routine. This is also going to help you become a more nurturing parent and person, once you learn to do it for yourself.

Overthinking all the decisions? Clickable image to download the motherhood uncomplicated: a 3-step straightforward clarity framework

Nurturing Yourself

How do we nurture ourselves? Nurturing yourself means to take the time and effort to plan those activities that you can do to continue the development of yourself. We are talking more than just showering, eating meals and going to the bathroom.

To truly nurture ourselves, we need to make it a priority. To make it a priority, we need to start handing off things from our to-do list to someone else. Start making a list of things that can be done by someone else – a partner, your kids, a neighbor, a family member. I promise you, there are handfuls of things on your list that can be handed off to someone else.

Let’s walk through the 3-Step Straightforward Clarity Framework to figure out how, when and what we can do to start nurturing ourselves.

Motherhood Uncomplicated: 3 step straightforward framework for problem solving. stop, observe and simplify. Realistic expectations, annoying mindset and self nurture

Realistic Expectations:

You have to have realistic expectations in parenting and motherhood. If you have a newborn and you’re breastfeeding, your obviously not going to be able to do what someone with 3 kids in full time elementary school can do. Think realistically about how you can get out of the house.

Mindset Bullshit

Time for some mindset bullshit – reminding yourself that this stage that you and your family is in is temporary. It won’t be like this forever and eventually, it will be easier to get out and start new hobbies. For now, try to work around your kids’ schedules (or lack thereof).


This step is exactly what we’re focusing on in this article. We’re trying to figure out the best way for you to build in some self-nurturing activities.

Overthinking all the decisions? Clickable image to download the motherhood uncomplicated: a 3-step straightforward clarity framework

Nurturing Yourself is NOT Selfish

Self-nurturing is not selfish. By nurturing yourself, you’re clearing your head and teaching yourself that you are important. In the long run (or even the short), this is going to help you be a more patient and understanding parent and friend.

Get into a Self-Nurturing Evironment

Make sure the people around you are on the same page as you when it comes to taking the time and energy to focus on yourself. Physically, you’re going to need a space that will allow that, too!

Self-Nurturing Activities

What are some things you can do to engage in self-nurturing? Ideally, these activities would be out of the house while you’re not responsible for the kids.

  • Start a new hobby
  • Pick up an old hobby
  • Go away for the weekend with your partner, friends or by yourself
  • Take yourself out to dinner and a movie
  • Start reading regularly
  • Start taking a workout class (outside of the house)
  • Take a college course on something that interests you
  • Volunteer with an organization that is important to you
  • Nurturing your family as a whole
Overthinking all the decisions? Clickable image to download the motherhood uncomplicated: a 3-step straightforward clarity framework

Nurturing Your Family

Another great way to engage in self-nurturing is by making sure you’re nurturing your family. Connecting with your partner and kids as a family fills your bucket. Will some of these be stressful? Maybe, likely yes. However, if we don’t try it, it won’t ever happen or get easier.

  • Family dinners (start small with ice cream outings)
  • Grocery store trips
  • Park visits
  • Family vacations
  • Family game nights
  • Read a chapter book together as a family
  • Family movie nights
  • Family dinners (at home)
  • Jumbo coloring pages

Nurturing Traditions

One surefire way to make sure you’re nurturing yourself regularly is to make sure you’re making it a habit and starting traditions. When can you make sure you get away with friends for a weekend every year? What night can you sign up for a workout class or book club?

Setting things into motion to be routines will make sure it happens.

Out with self-care and in with self-nurturing

So, we’re no longer considering spending time on yourself as “self-care.” We’re doing so much more than caring for ourselves. We are nurturing ourselves!

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