Self-care and Self-maintenance are buzzwords, especially in the mom community. But why are people taking basic human needs and making them seem like luxuries? Let’s break that down.
I’ve addressed self-care vs self-maintenance before but let’s dive a little deeper into the difference.

What is self-maintenance?
Self-maintenance is the bare minimum of what it takes to take care of yourself on a day-to-day basis. It’s 3 meals, snacks when hungry, a shower, a good night of sleep, brushing your teeth, drinking your water, etc.
Self-maintenance Examples
- Showering/bathing
- Brushing teeth
- Eating when hungry
- Getting fresh air when needed
- Sleeping at night
What is taking care of yourself as a mom?
There is a huge need for redefining self-maintenance for a mom. Society, somehow, has made moms feel as though getting a hot meal and a shower alone is a treat. That it’s “self-care.” This is bullshit.
Yes, self-care is necessary to function…but first and foremost comes taking care of yourself on a day-to-day.
A hot meal and a shower alone is self-maintenance for moms. It is necessary to your day-to-day living. Self-care is much deeper than a hot, uninterrupted shower. Don’t let society make you think this is enough for you.
Even Google is getting it twisted – in searching for the phrase “self-maintenance as a mom” to research for this post, I received a ton of results that jump right into self-care. There is a huge difference a big need to separate these two things.
Self-maintenance as a mom hits a little bit different. In addition to these basic human needs to get you through your day, we NEED short breaks from the chaos, decision making cycles and the incessant questions. Moms need more, period.

These are things I like to call “mom self-maintenance.” It’s the extra things that no one talks about that are necessary to get you through your mom day.
It’s the things you can do quickly to reset your mood and mindset while you’re still responsible for the kids.
Self-Care For Moms – We Need to Redefine
Ideas for taking basic care of your sanity as a mom
- Taking a 5-minute break from excess noise
- Take a few minutes to mindlessly scroll
- Handing over decisions to your partner
- Teaching your kids to play independently
- Have some alone time (when the kids are occupied and safe)
- Schedule your self-care
- Have a plan in place to start your week
How do you take care of your basic needs as a mom?
- Sneak it. Yep, I said it. Sometimes you have to be sneaky. Take a moment to scroll your phone while they’re taking a bath, coloring, etc.
- Teach your kids it’s okay. Show them that it’s imperative that you take care of yourself. This will allow them to give you the space to do so.
- Wake up before your kids or stay up later.
- Use screens to your advantage. Eat your hot breakfast while they watch morning shows.
- Lower your expectations of your kids. If you’re not used to taking care of yourself, this may be new to your kids. They will cry. They will be confused. Explain to them it’s necessary and what will happen when it’s done.
I hope this helped you understand the difference between self-maintenance and self-care. Self-maintenance are the basic things you need to survive your day-to-day. Self-care is necessary also, but they’re the things that go above and beyond your day-to-day care.